CAREER Archives - Our So Called 20s

Networking Tips: Building Meaningful Connections in Your Early Career 0 (0)

paris — Sat, 07 Dec 2024 22:24:49 +0000

If you haven’t heard the saying yet, I’m sure you’ll hear it soon. Your network is your networth. Something as simple as meeting and connecting with the right people can have a profound affect on the outcome and opportunities you are presented with in your career and even sometimes your personal life. These networking tips have helped me and many others over the year to establish a strong network that continues to evolve with us throughout the ebbs and flows of our careers and 20s.

Figure Out What You’re Interested In

Knowing what direction you want to go in is step one. If you don’t know what field you want to work in, you probably won’t quite know who to start looking for. Take some time to make sure you have this part established. It’ll save you lots of time down the road. You don’t have to know the exact job you’re looking for, but a ballpark of the industry or a sector within the industry is a great place to start!

Find a Mentor

Having a mentor completely changed my career and personal life trajectory, there is no doubt about it. Having a mentor, or mentors can really help instill guardrails in your personal and professional life. If you think about it, this person has already been where you are now. They’ve been able to look back and reflect on the decisions they made at your age and either stand-by them, or realize they should have gone about these things differently. This wisdom is now being passed down to you to save you time, energy, pain, and possibly even money. Heck, your mentor might even have some networking tips that you’ve never thought of, or funny stories of when they fumbled the ball in their early days of networking. Of course, you don’t have to do everything your mentors share or recommend to you, but it’s better to have the information than not.

How do you find a mentor you might ask? There really is no wrong way to go about this. If you went to school, it can be a professor you really clicked with, it can even be a teacher you had in high school. Maybe you ran into someone at a conference that you’ve stayed in touch with and really jive with. Once you’ve found the person you think you might want as a mentor, have more meetings with them and get to know them better. Once you feel comfortable and confident in the person, then ask if they would mind mentoring you. The biggest thing to remember is that you want this person to be miles ahead of you and share the same values and morals as you. It would be even better if they have a personal life you respect and desire as well. At the end of the day, if a mentor is there to give you guidance, why would you take advice from someone you don’t want to be anything like?

Advocate for Yourself and Put Yourself Out There

Growing up in school, we often had an adult who would advocate for us. Your teacher would point out that you were a hard worker, or your dad would introduce you to the local restaurant owner to help you get your first job. Well, the rest of our lives isn’t like that. You’re going to have to put yourself out there and sell yourself. This is no different in the networking process. If you want to connect with someone, you need to give them a reason to want to connect with you. Why would they want you in their circle? What do you offer that they don’t already have? What are you good at? Where do you see yourself going? What have you done to get to this point? Now, you don’t need to be boastful and egotistical. There’s a way to naturally bring these things up in conversation without coming off crass – hint ask them questions in this ballpark and I’m sure it’ll be followed with a “and what about you?”, which gives you the floor to share your story.

You want to be confident but not cocky when meeting people. In fact, I think that’s a good reminder in every aspect of life. You’re not trying to upstage the person, you’re just trying to level with them and show that you can keep up with them and are worthy of being in their orbit. Keep in mind this person should do the same for you. One of the most important things to keep in mind when building a network is quality over quantity. If you know a lot of people and yet none of them can provide any growth for you, then what you really have is a weak friend group. You want to build a strong network of people who can challenge you and motivate you, while also possibly opening doors for you later down the line.

Ask for Informational Interviews

Informational interviews are some of my favorite things to ask for and one of the most effective networking tips I’ve ever been given. Why? Because they are the least threatening way to ask to chat with someone – especially if you don’t have any mutuals or a true “reason” to talk to this person. The flip side of this is that most people if not everyone, love to talk about themselves. This means that you can ask the person anything you want (within reason), and you’ll get to hear all about their journey and maybe gain some nuggets of information as you go. Asking for an informational interview is a great way to be able to have a meaningful conversation with people all while connecting with someone you might not have otherwise. If you’re lucky, they’ll ask you why you chose to reach out to them and a few questions about where you are in your career journey. Most of the time, these interviews have ended in introductions to people in their circles and more follow-up meetings. You never know if you don’t ask.

>>Click here to download the Cold Email Outreach Template to help you with your next cold email. <<

Utilize LinkedIn

LinkedIn can be a great networking tool, but not in the way you might think. I personally am against adding people for the sake of. If I don’t know them, I don’t add them. I like my LinkedIn network to be truly reflective of my network and who I really know. With that being said, the mutual contacts feature on LinkedIn can be a huge help when properly utilized. If you are trying to get a hold of someone and you see that you have a mutual, reach out to your mutual and ask if they are willing to do an introduction for you. This is why having a legitimate list of connections on LinkedIn is so important.

Another thing you can look at on LinkedIn is where someone has worked previously. Maybe you used to work at the same company, or maybe you went to the same school. Or maybe you had a similar career transition going from marketing to tech sales let’s say. No matter the similarity, doing some preliminary research here can be a great starting point for getting a conversation going.

Pass the Baton

I cannot stress this part enough. Just like your mentor will pass a baton to you, it’s crucial that you do the same thing for the people behind you. Odds are giving and helping others will give you more in return than when you just go out searching for something to take. The world is so small and you never know who knows who. You might also learn something from the person you’re helping. And who knows, maybe one day they’ll actually end up being ahead of you and you’ll need to call on them. You just never know, so don’t think you don’t have time to help those behind you or even on the same road as you. There is plenty of room for everyone at the top. Make sure you don’t do the climb alone. Bring others up with you, because at the end of the day, those people are still a part of your network. Better yet, share these networking tips with them and watch them grow in this area right beside you.

>>Click here to read Giving Back…Life is Bigger Than Just You<<

Networking isn’t about the instant result. Networking is all about connecting with like-minded individuals and having a strong rolodex of people to call on when you need it. Use these networking tips to help you build the connections now and worry about what you’ll get from it later, or better yet, not at all. I’m confident you’ll never regret the time and effort put into building a strong network.

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25 Secret Santa Gifts Under $25 (From Amazon) 0 (0)

paris — Sat, 30 Nov 2024 05:52:23 +0000

Ah, Secret Santa. The annual office formality that you never want to fumble on. It’s not a secret that life is getting more and more expensive and buying ancillary gifts is the last thing that anyone wants to do. Here is a list of 25 Secret Santa gifts under $25, in hopes of making this time of year just a little bit easier. Brought to you by Amazon of course. Thank you Jeff Bezos!

Hopefully, this list of 25 Secret Santa Gifts under $25 helps make your office’s Secret Santa just a little bit easier and wallet-friendly.

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How to Avoid Burnout 0 (0)

paris — Sat, 30 Nov 2024 03:22:15 +0000

**Burn-out* (n)** – a syndrome conceptualized as resulting from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed. It is characterized by three dimensions:

- feelings of energy depletion or exhaustion;
- increased mental distance from one’s job, or feelings of negativism or cynicism related to one’s job; and
- reduced professional efficacy.

*according to the World Health Organization

It’s a real thing. If you haven’t experienced it yet, I’m so happy for you. If you have experienced it, you know how it feels. And if you feel like you’re not far from experiencing it, you’re probably right. Burnout takes a while to fully get back from, but is something that can also be avoided if you’re smart about it. These are some of my top ways to avoid burnout.

1. Don’t Set Yourself Up for Failure

Sometimes we get so caught up in checking off everything on our to-do list that we forget to realize how long the to-do list is constantly getting. Being productive is a great thing! But over-committing yourself day after day will set you up for failure. It’s important to remember that there are only a subset of working hours in a day. How many exist in your personal schedule is up to you and your specific situation. For some people, it’s eight working hours. For others, it might be 10. No matter what your limit is, don’t set yourself up for 12 hours of work, if the limit is eight hours. Sure, sometimes you need to overhaul the day, but doing that for months on end will only lead you in one direction. A good metric for me is checking in on my personal life tasks, ie laundry, cleaning, cooking, grocery shopping, etc. If I’m getting to a point where month after month, I’m struggling to keep up with household responsibilities which only help me set myself up well for the next day, then there’s probably an aspect of imbalance in my life, which is soon to lead to burnout. Think about it. Unloading your groceries, washing dishes, unloading the dishwasher, and taking out the trash, probably take about 10 minutes for each task. Doing laundry only takes about 30 minutes of active work. If you’re struggling to keep up with personal tasks that collectively take you about 1.5 hours out of your daily or week, something is off. You might be overloading yourself with work, and neglecting your personal life, which is a great path to burnout.

2. Take Breaks – But Seriously

A 9-5 is a myth nowadays, and I think we all know that. I think an 8-7 is more like it, but even then everyone’s job requires a different chunk of their daily time. When you are just running Monday through Friday or even working on the weekends, you really need to make time to reboot. Take a break, even if that is just a couple of hours on the weekend. Constantly consuming your brain with work tasks and responsibilities will eventually drive you mad. When you start to forget what day it is, or stop recognizing the weekends as a time for some sort of personal reboot, you might need to take a step back and reevaluate the way you are going about your work. I understand that some industries require weekend work, I’ve been in one myself. But is there something you can do for yourself every few weekends to help give yourself time to reboot? This might even be something as simple as scheduling a dinner with friends or setting up a round of golf. This small change of routine in your life and social interaction can be a huge boost to your morale and stamina. It’s also a great reminder that you are human and not a robot made only to work in your life. Taking breaks is a huge step in the right direction to avoid burnout.

3. Make Time to Be Childish

“Being childish” is one of my favorite things to do right now. Yes, we are adults, but when did we forget about the joys of the things we once loved as kids? Remember when we used to have after-school activities
doing the most random things? From taekwondo to drawing classes, to chess club, to sports. We used to do it all on a weekly basis. Let’s bring that back! Find the activities that you used to enjoy or new activities that you want to explore and give them a go! There is no loss in this investment and there is no better time in life than your 20s to get back into your hobbies or find new ones. Maybe you’ve always wanted to get into horseback riding. Maybe you want to join a rec flag football team in your area. It can be anything! You are more than your job and it’s okay to do something that is just “for fun”. Doing these “childish” activities will help you refresh your mind, step away from your mounting work responsibilities, and replenish your energy and creativity in a different way.

4. Spend Time with Friends and Family

We are all social creatures, even the introverted ones out there. We are all a part of a community and your involvement in these is valued and appreciated. Our work schedule can get ahead of us sometimes, but no one ever wants to be that person who’s 50, successful, yet has no one to call on Friday or Saturday night. Just like you invest your time into your work and career, don’t forget to step back and invest time into your community. Check in on the people around you and let them check in on you too. Stay a part of your friends’ and family’s lives and allow yourself to decompress, laugh cry, and make memories outside of your office and computer screen. Social interaction can be a huge mood booster and stress reliever in your life and just like taking a break, and making time to be childish, having a change in your schedule can really help you to avoid burnout. Remember what is worth it at the end of the day, and ask your friends and family to hold you accountable to ensure that you’re finding balance in your life.

5. Move Your Body

Move, move, move. You can never move enough! Sitting sedentary in front of a computer screen day after day can really get to a person. It’s important that you make time to exercise, go on a walk, stretch, and get away from your office chair. Get some sunlight and fresh air, and let your mind and body reconnect from time to time. It’s even better if you can do this on a daily basis. Sitting sedentary all the time and starting out the same window day after day is not good for your mindset. Eventually, you’ll feel like a hamster running on the same wheel day after day getting nowhere. Although the odds are that you are being productive, being in the same place at the same time on repeat will make you feel differently. Don’t be afraid to change up your workplace for the day or your style of work if you can.

Burnout is a b*tch to say the least. I’ve learned my lesson the hard way before and I only hope to help prevent this from occurring in other people’s lives. I got so caught up in the day-to-day that I failed to stop, reflect, and live along the way. Make sure you do this, and remember to do the fun and childish things along the way. At the end of the day, spending time doing anything other than work is a great way to avoid burnout.

Sources:

“Burn-out an ‘Occupational Phenomenon’: International Classification of Diseases.” World Health Organization, World Health Organization, www.who.int/news/item/28-05-2019-burn-out-an-occupational-phenomenon-international-classification-of-diseases. Accessed 29 Nov. 2024.

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7 Work Life Balance Tips for 2025 0 (0)

paris — Sat, 30 Nov 2024 00:20:23 +0000

Being career and achievement-driven can be a double-edged sword. On one end, you want to give life all you’ve got and make the most of your 20s. On the other end, you’re trying to enjoy your 20s, stay afloat, and achieve your personal goals simultaneously. I don’t know about you, but I know it can sometimes get very overwhelming and you don’t quite know where to start. Hopefully, these 7 work-life balance tips can help you spring into 2025 with a solid foundation.

1. Get Enough Sleep

Sleep is so much more important than we all realize. Of course, your body can go a while without proper rest, but eventually, it’ll come crashing down. Just like a car’s engine, after a while you have to shut the car off, and let it rest. If you run it 24/7, the wear and tear on the car will compound much faster than expected and eventually it’ll stop working. Your body is the same way. Don’t keep your engine running. As often as you can, reach for eight hours of sleep, and if you can’t try to let your body rest and reboot over the weekend. Make sure you aren’t exposing yourself to unnecessary blue light right before bed. Yes, that means putting your phone away an hour before bed to help you properly wind down.

2. Have Hobbies

Hobbies are some things that can go by the wayside as we get older and start our careers. Suddenly everything fun has to be productive, and any second of downtime is spent doing mundane tasks like grocery shopping. If you’re not busy, then you’re exhausted and trying to recover from all the energy you’ve depleted throughout the week. I get it. One thing that has really helped me reboot after a long week is bringing my hobbies back into play. For some people that’s long-distance running. For you, that may be pottery making, playing music, cooking, making cocktails, surfing, skiing, painting, reading, rock climbing, you name it. Find the activities that make you happy and do those more. Shut your brain off from work and achievements and just learn how to be a kid again. Find fulfillment in just being you – outside of those life achievements.

3. Unplug Daily

This might be one of the hardest things to do, I know. If it’s not our work computer, it’s our personal computers. If it’s not our computer it’s our phone, or our smart watch, or our tablets and e-readers. The list goes on and on. With notifications coming in left and right, it’s never easy to just “unplug”. Something that has helped me, is setting a wind-down reminder on my phone. So about one hour before my planned bedtime, my phone will go into do-not disturb mode, silencing all of my notifications and allowing me to focus on my wind-down routine and not lose focus. I have friends who have also put certain permissions on their phones to stop them from opening certain apps at certain times of the day. This can be super helpful for those serial scrollers. Once you’ve interfered with your screen usage, make sure to replace that time with another activity, ie reading a book, doing yoga, cooking, etc. >>Click here for an easy-read recommendation: Ikigai: The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life.

4. Prioritize Self-Care

Self-care. The term we’ve all heard a million times over and over again. This can look like so many different things for different people. For some, it may look like having a slow night, drawing a bath, and reading their favorite book or watching their favorite show. For others, it may look like treating yourself to a massage or a facial. It can even be as simple as getting yourself a coffee and going on a walk, or sitting in a bar and ordering your favorite drink. There is no wrong way to prioritize self-care. What’s important is that you take time to do things for yourself, regardless of what’s going on around you. Investing in yourself will only increase your productivity and energy down the line. I’m not sure when treating yourself became demonized, but I think it’s important that we bring this aspect of life back to our routines.

5. Exercise

Exercise, exercise, exercise. It is never not important. No matter how you choose to go about this, make sure it is incorporated into your routine in some way shape, or form. Exercise can look different for everyone. You could be someone who likes to hit 10k steps a day, or you can be someone who likes low-intensity workouts like pilates or yoga. You could be someone who enjoys hit workouts, kickboxing, or jiujitsu. You could be someone who likes going on intense hikes, swimming, or just hitting the plain ole gym. Whatever it is, make it a non-negotiable priority in your daily life. Exercise has been proven to reduce stress, improve sleep patterns, aid in your overall long-term health, and help relieve chronic pain for those who suffer from it. The other perk of exercise when it comes to work-life balance, is the fact that you can’t do anything else while you’re exercising. You go in to complete a task and you don’t leave until it’s done. Take this time to just focus on yourself, and not the glooming to-do list that you know is at the top of your mind. >>Click here to learn more about the importance of exercise on the human body.

6. Fuel Your Body Right

The food you put into your body is just as important as the way you treat the outside of your body. Food is fuel for the human body, so many sure you are putting the right things in it. This means eating the rainbow. Make sure your diet is full of plenty of fruits and vegetables, whole grains and legumes, and as little processed foods as possible. It can be really easy to get caught up in eating out 24/7, or grabbing that microwave burrito from the fridge section of the grocery store. Although we all fall victim to the element of convenience, it’s important to not let it create a habit. Take the time to prepare food for yourself, especially if you have time to meal prep on the weekends. Something as simple as meal prepping can make healthy eating even easier for you to keep up with throughout the week, while also saving you money in the long run. “Fueling your body” with chips, soda, fast food, and processed sugars, is a surefire way to make sure your body will crash and burn, in turn making it harder to focus at work, complete basic tasks, and stay sharp. Eat the rainbow and give your brain and body the best chance at staying on top of your work-life balance.

7. Touch Grass

This has become one of my favorite sayings over this past year. This is mostly because it seems to solve so many problems in my life. Sometimes we get so caught up on what’s next, what’s around the corner, or what we don’t have. We are glued to our computers or staring at our phones with our heads down, hoping to get a glimmer of a dopamine hit, one scroll at a time. When life gets overwhelming, when work seems like too much, when your phone keeps pinging, just go touch grass. Go step outside, take a breather, and just be with yourself and your thoughts. Ignore whatever people are asking of you in that moment and just take five minutes to yourself. Of course, if you’re about to walk into a board meeting, this probably isn’t the best time to step away, but maybe make an effort earlier that morning to take some time, or later that evening. Whenever you have time, get some fresh air and sunlight. Sunlight exposure has been proven to help elevate one’s mood, lower blood pressure, improve sleep, and so much more. >>Click here to learn more about the benefits of sunlight exposure.

Work-life balance is a lifelong journey that only you will know how to best craft for your unique situation. Although it’s easy to fall into the trap of “perfecting” this aspect of your life, don’t let this stop you from just starting. Perfection isn’t important. What’s important is that you start investing in yourself and your well-being and not just dumping every moment of your life into work. Even though this may feel fulfilling in the now, long-term you will regret not taking the time to perform routine maintenance checks and oil changes along the way.

The post 7 Work Life Balance Tips for 2025 0 (0) appeared first on Our So Called 20s.

Your Next Successful Cold Email Template 5 (1)

paris — Sun, 24 Nov 2024 02:09:08 +0000

Reaching out to someone you’ve never met can be daunting. I think the fear of rejection can be a hindrance for many – but remember, the worst they can say is ‘no’ or just not respond at all. With that in mind, you’ve truly lost nothing, but by not giving it a shot, you risk losing more.

Bet on yourself and give yourself a shot. Drop an email in that person’s inbox and see what happens. You just never know!

Where to Begin

Doing a little bit of research going into this can be super helpful. I have found that the biggest factor in my success rate of response is by making the email as personal as possible. The only way to do this is by learning a little bit about the person. You don’t have to spend hours on this, but five minutes can go a long way.

What do I mean by this?

The wonderful world of LinkedIn!

Search the person’s name, see where they’ve worked, or maybe what they studied, or where they studied. Do you have any mutuals? Are they a part of a club or organization you know about? Do you live in the same city or a city you have an interest in relocating to? Is their pathway intriguing to you? Odds are you can find something in common with this person. Find the thing, and make a list of one of two things – you’ll need this for your email.

Ex:

This person studied business but all of their experience is in the medical sector of tech.
This person used to work in entertainment but now works in venture capital.
This person went to a state school and got a job at a top corporate company right out of college.
This person is working at the company you are trying to apply for but came from something very different in their previous role.

Whatever the relatable thing is, find it! At the end of the day, why are you reaching out to this person, instead of someone else? Which brings me to the next part…

What About This Person Excites You?

Of course, you might have found this individual purely based on the company they work for – but why this one person instead of the other 30 people in the same position? If I’m being honest, sometimes there isn’t a profound reason, but if there is one, mention this and use it to your advantage.

Ex:

I see that we have a mutual, (insert name).
I was referred to you by (insert name).
My professor said you would be a good person to reach out to.
I saw that you used to work at (Company X). I used to work there too!
Your pathway seemed unique and I’d love to hear your story.

My Biggest Piece of Email Advice

There’s no question that you’re probably reaching out to this person because you need or want something from them. That’s okay – there’s no crime in that! I would refrain from asking for that right off the bat in a cold email. I think the best way to do it is to ask for an informational interview first. Just get to know the person, and let your true ask come up in conversation organically. That has always worked out tenfold for me.

“What’s an information interview?”

An information interview is a proposed conversation where you just get to learn about the person’s career journey, current position, industry insights, or other career-related questions. This is typically done with someone who has experience in the requested field – hence why you are reaching out to this person. It can oftentimes be a great way to get to know someone and also learn from them. I’ve had many informational interviews that resulted in mentorship or actual friendship down the line.

Although you may think that you will only talk about this other person’s life and career, be prepared for some of your proposed questions to come back to you! It’s not uncommon for the interviewee to ask “What about you?” after a question. This might sound scary, but honestly, it’s the best-case scenario, as it allows you to give the person some insights on yourself and then eventually weasel in the true ask that you have.

>> Click here to download the Succesful Cold Email Template <<

Notice that the email isn’t too lengthy and there isn’t a bunch of fluff. Keep it this way! You want to be short and to the point. Odds are the person you reached out to is very busy, so don’t try to take up too much of their time by just reading your email. Keep in mind that you also want to show that you were purposeful in your outreach and have done a bit of research. The added elements of personalization will help you in this area.

Don’t be afraid to seek guidance and support in whatever you are trying to achieve next. You’d be surprised how many people are willing to help and are even eager to do so!

Below are some successful cold email examples that have been collected from people in all different industries and backgrounds.

The post Your Next Successful Cold Email Template 5 (1) appeared first on Our So Called 20s.

Put Yourself Out There. Start That Thing! 4.5 (2)

paris — Thu, 08 Aug 2024 02:28:37 +0000

I know you probably have an idea, a concept, a business, a project that you’ve wanted to start but haven’t yet. I know you’ve probably revisited the same idea time and time again and started drafting a plan to only become stuck at the same point. I know you’ve probably given yourself 100 reasons why it won’t work and why it’s a waste of your time and energy. I have to ask you, have you thought about what happens if/when the idea does work out? Have you thought about how you would feel if all your hard work paid off and you successfully bet on yourself? Have you thought about the sense of accomplishment, confidence, and self-pride you would carry? If not, lean into these positive thoughts more than the negative.

The Weight of Self-Doubt
Negative thoughts and words have a much heavier weight than you may realize. They can truly become debilitating. If I can give you any piece of advice, it would be that the world will provide you with enough negativity and doubt, so you don’t need to add to it. Truly. Society and this stupid thing called jealousy already have that covered for you, so don’t sweat it. There are always going to be nay-sayers, don’t join their team.

What Are You Afraid of?
I know from personal experience that what stands in the way of my starting something is typically my fear of what other people will think of me if I fail. As I’ve gotten older and looked back at all the small concepts I’ve started, some from as early on as my neighborhood car wash company, I’ve realized that I don’t regret any of them. Not a single one. In fact, I’m so glad I’ve tried every single thing I’ve tried over the years. Each concept I’ve attempted to develop has taught me a skillset or lesson that I’ve used to better achieve the next thing, and so on it goes. Never has any of my work gone to waste or been for not. So, if you’re afraid of failure, know that you’re not failing at all. You’re truly just building a better, bigger, and stronger toolkit that you’ll use one day down the road for that big thing. Read more oursocalled20s.com

Rome Wasn’t Built in a Day
Success isn’t built overnight. I think we all know that at our core, but sometimes we tend to forget. As just a reminder, many of the household names that we know and celebrate today did not strike gold until much later in their lives.

Eric Yuan – Founder of Zoom – 41
Stan Lee – Creator of The Fantastic Four and the Marvel Cinematic Universe – 39
Martha Stewart – Famous Celebrity Chef, published her first cookbook at 41
Vera Wang – Famous fashion designer entered the fashion industry at 40
Kris Jenner – pitched the idea of the reality TV show Keeping Up with the Kardashians at 52
Sam Walton – Founder of Walmart – 42
Henry Ford – Founder of Ford Automotive – 45
Arianna Huffington – Founder of the Huffington Post – 55

If you think any of these people found immense success on their first concept, with their first concept being the one that made them a household name, you’re wrong. These individuals all had a laundry list of trials and tribulations to overcome to reach those golden moments, and I’m certain they experienced a bunch of them after, as well. There’s no doubt in my mind. That’s just the reality of life. Now, imagine if any of them had never started these golden ideas because their negative thoughts, fear, and what ifs got in the way. I can assure you each of their respective industries would look a LOT different today.

“But I’m Not Ready Yet”
Stop waiting until you feel 100% ready – it’ll never happen. The idea of being ready implies that you foresee all that will go wrong up ahead and you’re trying to equip yourself with a solution on day 1. The reality is you have no idea what those speed bumps will be or when they will happen. So, don’t let that be the reason for not starting. “Fake it till you make it” is a great saying to live by in many aspects of your life. And the truth is, most people are doing just that. You’ll never be ready, but I bet you’ll figure out a solution as the problems arise.

Make a Plan and Start
Stop paying attention to how things could go wrong and start putting energy into making the best plan of action to start things off right! Figure out what the goal is. Then, think about the best and most sustainable ways for you to start, and do just that. Start! Take a big leap of faith off that starting line, and don’t look back. Be proud of yourself, too! The first step is truly the hardest.

Bet on yourself. Go after it before it disappears in the speed of life that we call time. Go start that thing! You’ll never regret trying. You’ll only reminisce on what would have happened if you had ever really tried.

Sources

Akhtar, Allana, et al. “30 people who became highly successful after age 40.” Business Insider, 28 Dec. 2022, www.businessinsider.com/24-people-who-became-highly-successful-after-age-40-2015-6#arianna-huffington-founded-her-namesake-news-publication-the-huffington-post-at-age-55-while-she-worked-as-a-political-commentator-and-writer-for-her-early-career-the-success-of-her-digital-media-publication-made-her-a-household-name-huffpost-later-sold-to-aol-for-315-million-30.

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Knowing What You Don’t Want is Just as Important 5 (1)

paris — Mon, 08 Jul 2024 02:29:37 +0000

Do you ever feel like people constantly expect you to know what you want in every aspect of your life right now? What’s your dream job title? Where do you want to settle down? What do you want in a partner? When will you get married? What are you going to do next? What do you want for your life? Where do you see yourself in ten years? I feel like these are questions I hear on the daily.

If you’re anything like me, the answer to many of these questions isn’t as strong or as confident as people expect them to be. I personally think that so much about society, life, and my own expectations for my life change year after year. So, to say that I am confident about my wants ten years from now, let alone five or two years from now – impossible. It feels like society puts all this pressure on you to know what you want out of life now, so you can make all the right decisions to ensure you end up at the finish line. Sometimes I wish there was just as much effort put into asking what we don’t want. If you think about it, knowing what you don’t want is just as important, right? It’s almost like the process of elimination but with your whole life. You may not be confident in the exact thing that you want, but you for sure know where you don’t want to go. I might be totally missing the mark here, but I think knowing what you don’t want is just as important. It’s something we should lean into more.

Career
If you are someone who knows what you want to do for the rest of your life, and you know the exact job title you’re gunning for, I salute you. I can’t say that applies to me. I am lucky to have a pretty solid footing in my career, and I am farther ahead than I think anyone ever expected in such a short amount of time compared to the industry standard. I’m very grateful for the opportunities that I’ve had and all the places I’ve been able to go to because of my career. I’m grateful for the fact that I’ve been able to really dive deep into my world and be trusted to dabble in different sectors of my industry so early in my career, as well. If you asked me five years ago if I thought I’d be doing what I’m doing now, the answer would be a flat out “no.” If you asked me if this is what I ever saw myself doing, I’d say “no.” And if you asked me if I regret the direction I’ve taken, I’d also say “no.” Although I see myself in the final days of my current industry, I know everything I’ve done and will continue to do is only a steppingstone to the greater things I’m likely to do later in my life. Read more oursocalled20s.com

I share this with you for many reasons. For starters, I’m working in the exact industry I went to school for. I’m working in the exact industry that I was infatuated with as a kid growing up. I’m doing what my closest friends and family always expected me to do. But now I’m in deep, and I find myself questioning, “Is this what I want to do? Or were these just the opportunities I was given that I kept saying ‘yes’ to?” Don’t get me wrong, I love my industry, and I will always find myself reverting back to it in some way, but at the same time, I feel there’s something more for me out there that I’ve yet to discover. Even now, in my spot today, I don’t know what I want to do for the rest of my career. I’m just learning what I don’t want and trying to reach that answer through process and elimination. I know one day I want to own my own business. In what area? At this point in my life, my answer is “industry agnostic.” I think the world is going to change so much by the time I’m ready to take that big leap of faith, but for now, I know what I don’t want out of my work life. I know what I need to learn more and what my current strengths are. I know where I don’t want to be in my career 10 years from now, and I think that is just as important as “knowing” some pie in the sky end goal. The reality is that the pie is bound to change. So, why would I chase after something that truly isn’t as fixed as it appears?

Your Partner
This is a fun one to me. How many of us had our dream girlfriends/boyfriends conjured in our heads growing up? How many of us thought we knew what they would look like, what they’d like to do, what our dynamic would be, so on and so on? How many of us actually guessed right? I know I have not been right once in this department, lol. Might I add that I couldn’t be happier that I was wrong. And I’m not just talking about the way someone looks, but about who the person actually is. The ways that they differ from me and the ways that they are similar to me. The things that we taught each other and the things they taught me. I didn’t know a thing. I didn’t even realize all that I needed in a partner until I had things I realized were good for me.

I think knowing everything you want in a partner is a farse. Sure, there are basic things you should know. Basic thoughts like, “I want someone who makes me smile, someone who makes me feel safe, someone who makes me feel confident, someone who makes me feel valued, someone who makes me happy.” Those should be a given. But maybe something that you’ll discover is that you need someone who’s more patient than you, who aligns perfectly on the big stuff yet opens your mind to the smaller stuff. Maybe you’ll find that you need someone who calls you out on your slip-ups and gets in front of you when you’re doing too much in life. If someone asked you who you want your future partner to be, it’s okay to say, “I don’t know, but I know what I don’t want.” I think knowing that you don’t want someone who’s negative, arrogant, disrespectful, unintelligent, etc. will knock many people out of the race and helps you start to narrow things down. At the end of the day, wanting someone who complements you, makes you better every day, and someone you can do anything in life with…that’s worth noting. The rest will come with time. There’s no reason to have all the answers today.

Where You Call Home
This one is my favorite question. Anyone who knows me knows I travel a lot – mostly for work, so it’s not like I’m just galivanting around the world for fun and adventure, but I’ve seen a good bit of the world. I still have a lot to go, but I’m grateful for what I have seen thus far. People ask me all the time, “So, where do you want to settle down?” I still don’t know the direct answer to this. Every place has its pros and cons. Every place has its lack of something and slightly annoying aspects. I couldn’t even tell you where I think I’ll be living next year, but I can tell you what environment I’m seeking in this chapter of my life. I can tell you what I know is a healthy and unhealthy environment for me. I can tell you what elements I like to have accessible in the place that I live. When I look into the future, I can tell you what elements of life I hope my kids will have as they grow up. I can tell you what I hope they won’t have to experience in their own backyards. I can tell you what I do not want to be around at an older age. But could I name a country, city, or state in which all of my boxes are checked? Let alone define what all of my boxes are? Not at all. And that’s okay! Knowing what I don’t like in my living environment will push me just that much closer to finding the place that I do prefer one day. Whether that be for next year or ten years from now.

Don’t let the unknown or not having a definite answer discourage you from heading in a direction. At the end of the day, knowing what you don’t want will get you closer to the answers you didn’t realize you were looking for. The more you walk away from the things you do not wish to seek out, the stronger the paths of what you are seeking will appear. Don’t let people pressure you into divulging an answer today, because when you get there, you might realize it doesn’t fulfill you as much as you once thought it would. Giving yourself options will never make a move permanent.

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Fail. Again, Again, and Again. 0 (0)

paris — Mon, 10 Jun 2024 03:30:37 +0000

Failure. A word with a negative connotation, oftentimes implying that one has lost or was not enough. A word that is regularly correlated with deep shame, embarrassment, and tears. The funny thing is I’ve never heard of someone reaching a milestone without failing on their way to reach the achievement. There seems to be almost an expectation that you will hit a homerun on the first swing… an expectation that you will never strike out or miss a swing. I hate to break it to you, but the truth is you will miss, many times, though you should.

The Building Blocks to Success
I am a firm believer that failing is the first building block to success. When you try something and it doesn’t work out the way you wanted or expected it to, it tells you whether or not your hypothesis was right or wrong. Failing teaches you that the approach you took only worked up to a certain point. Failing forces you to look at a solution differently. Using all of these viewpoints helps propel you to the next step on the ladder, which will eventually bring you success. You’ll never get from A to Z in one jump. Sometimes you’ll land on H, and sometimes you’ll land on O, and sometimes you’ll land so close to W and not quite make it. Instead of sitting and sulking, celebrate how far you’ve come and where you’re currently standing.

Frustration
Failing can be really frustrating. There’s no question about it. I think it’s okay to feel frustration. Allow yourself to be human and feel frustration. Often, this can be used as fuel. The idea that you know you can reach the end goal. The idea that you know you should have been able to make it work. The idea that you should have been able to figure it out. Whatever that feeling is, lean into it and turn it into motivation, because the reality is: you can do it. Don’t let any other thoughts creep into your head. Those will only distract you from the mission.

Science Fairs
Think about when we were kids and we all had that giant dreaded science fair project. If you remember, we all had to come up with a project, or maybe you were assigned one. Then, we created a hypothesis, and we tested that hypothesis three to five times and reported on it. Some of us found the answer we were looking for, and some of us discovered that we were looking at the project all wrong the whole time. Either way, after a certain amount of time, we all gave presentations of our experience during the project, successes and failures encountered. At the conclusion, we had our completed projects.

Life is like one giant science fair, and each new goal you make is just a science project. Of course, there is much more on the line, like paying your bills or getting the next career move or finding the perfect girl/guy. No doubt about it, the stakes are higher. But by the same token, doesn’t that make the learning process just that much more important? If you never take the time to challenge yourself and learn from each baby step along the way, you’ll struggle to reach the success you’re looking for. If you never make yourself uncomfortable now, you’re going to be wildly uncomfortable and stressed when life forces you to get uncomfortable. And most importantly, if you never challenge yourself and push yourself because you’re afraid of failing, every challenge that life throws at you is going to seem monstruous, and the reality is – it probably isn’t. Read more oursocalled20s.com

Fail Forward Proudly
Life isn’t easy. Especially our 20s! Don’t make the future harder for yourself because you’re afraid of someone seeing you scrape your knees now. Sh*t happens. People misstep and trip-up. I’ve yet to meet someone who hasn’t, so take the opportunities to grow and learn and push yourself that much closer to achieving the things you once thought you couldn’t. It’s far better to have the option to say “no” to something in life because you know you can do it and realize it’s not a challenge for you anymore than to say “no” to something because you know you’re ill-equipped for what life is about to throw at you.

Failing forward, as I like to call it, only gets you closer to your highest potential and your final goal. At the end of the day, you should do this for you, so who cares if someone sees you trip? It isn’t their show to watch anyways. And I bet once you get to the top, no one will count the amount of misses you encountered along the way. I know whoever you’re comparing yourself to in your head – you’ve only counted their wins, not their misses. That should tell you something.

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The Worst They Can Say is ‘No’ 0 (0)

paris — Sun, 10 Jan 2021 03:36:37 +0000

I imagine that if you are someone who has scouted out a community like this one, and you have chosen to read this specifically, you are someone who both creates and strives towards goals. You might not be the most confident in believing you can obtain these goals in your set length of time, but you still have them. You have every intention of reaching them.

I am you. I have long-term and short-terms goals, some of which I still question whether I’ll ever hit. The pathway to reaching those goals can feel daunting and scary, no doubt. I’m right there with you. By the end of this post, my hope is that you grow in confidence and truly believe that you will reach those goals even faster than you think. Maybe you’ll even overcome some fears in the process.

Fear

One word that says it all. We all experience fear… some more than others. It can quite literally become a debilitating force in many of our lives. I know it used to keep a tight grip on me. It brings all the negative thoughts in your mind to life and makes you question if something is really worthwhile. Although fear is an innate human instinct that I think you should listen to, I do not believe it should always stop you from pushing forward. Some of the best accomplishments I’ve ever achieved have come from working through fear. Read more oursocalled20s.com

Of course, there are different types of fear. There’s fear of rejection. There’s fear of failure. There’s fear of falling. There’s fear of loss of stability. The kind of fear that most impacts me is fear of a tarnished reputation when I fail or miss the mark. “What will people think of my abilities if I don’t knock this out of the park?” That is a topic for another time. If you’re reading this, my guess is that you’re afraid of rejection or failure. One thing I want you to remember is that you didn’t fail, you were just walking down the wrong sidewalk. Turn around and find another one. The right path is bound to be out there.

You are your best advocate

My high school volleyball coach once told me, “You will always be your best advocate. If you don’t speak up for yourself, no one else ever will.” That wisdom has stuck with me throughout my whole life. In my opinion, it’s one of the truest statements you can grasp. At the end of the day, how can someone else ever know what you want if you’ve never expressed it?

You know yourself better than anyone. You know best what your strengths and your weaknesses are. No matter the job or the thing you’re gunning for, focus on selling your strengths! Figure out what the job requires that you have hands-down and lean in on that. Oftentimes, we let the things we don’t have cut us out of the race. We give more weight to the things we lack than the things we excel at. The reality is that anyone can learn anything, especially in today’s day and age. So let them decide if that skill or ability is really that important to their company. This leads me to my next point…

Don’t cut yourself out the race

Too often we don’t even try to go after what we want because we assume the answer is going to be “no.” I encourage you to let someone else decide that you’re not fit for a role. At the end of the day, someone will make that decision, but don’t make that decision for them. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve received calls for a role I’m not that great at, or how often I’ve been hired despite my actual lack of experience in a particular area. There are many people out there who will hire you based on your drive, your perspective, your teachability, or the fact that your experience is the exact opposite of everyone else’s, which adds a different problem-solving perspective to the team.

In life, people will have no problem telling you “no.” A slew of people will miss out on a great candidate, you, and discount the work you’ve done and your potential. Let them. It’s nothing personal; it’s just par for the course. Bet on yourself and be proud of what you have accomplished. At the end of the day, you know the mountains you’ve climbed to get to where you are.

A ‘no’ now is not a ‘no’ forever

I know we all have our own mental timelines regarding when certain things should come our way, but the reality is that the time frame we have planned out isn’t likely to happen. I’m someone who loves a good plan. I try my darndest to make sure everything goes according to the plan if I can help it. But I know deep down, my time frame is not always reality’s time frame. With that said, if you are rejected from a job or someone tells you, “No,” remember it’s not a “no” forever. It’s just a “no” for right now, and that’s okay. Things might change in three months, six months, or even a year. On the flip side, you might actually come across something better later that you actually want more. Sometimes a “no” is a blessing in disguise. No matter what, the experience you had leading up to that “no” should still be considered. Review that experience and take something new away from it. Don’t let the experience go to waste.

Rejection sucks no matter how you spin it, but don’t let past rejection or the fear of rejection stop you from pursuing what you want. At the end of the day, the worst someone can say is “no,” and, ultimately, that doesn’t change anything about your life. It only tells you to try walking down another sidewalk.

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CAREER Archives - Our So Called 20s

Networking Tips: Building Meaningful Connections in Your Early Career 0 (0)

Figure Out What You’re Interested In

Find a Mentor

Advocate for Yourself and Put Yourself Out There

Ask for Informational Interviews

Utilize LinkedIn

Pass the Baton

25 Secret Santa Gifts Under $25 (From Amazon) 0 (0)

1. For the wine enthusiast

2. For the workout buff

3. For the hostess with the mostest

4. For the King of Dad jokes

5. For the handyman

6. For the avid golfer

7. For the Type-A employee

8. For the vibe curator

9. For the kid at heart

10. For the trendy one

11. For the big snacker

12. For the candle lover

13. For the accountant

14. For the bourbon connoisseur

15. For the woman who’s constantly traveling

16. For the Neat Freak

17. For the iced coffee/match addict

18. For the matcha obsessed

19. For the adventure seeker

20. For the movie lover

21. For the beanie wearer

22. For skin enthusiast

23. For the meditation master

24. For the naturopath

25. For the office mug user