I imagine that if you are someone who has scouted out a community like this one, and you have chosen to read this specifically, you are someone who both creates and strives towards goals. You might not be the most confident in believing you can obtain these goals in your set length of time, but you still have them. You have every intention of reaching them.

I am you. I have long-term and short-terms goals, some of which I still question whether I’ll ever hit. The pathway to reaching those goals can feel daunting and scary, no doubt. I’m right there with you. By the end of this post, my hope is that you grow in confidence and truly believe that you will reach those goals even faster than you think. Maybe you’ll even overcome some fears in the process.

Fear

One word that says it all. We all experience fear… some more than others. It can quite literally become a debilitating force in many of our lives. I know it used to keep a tight grip on me. It brings all the negative thoughts in your mind to life and makes you question if something is really worthwhile. Although fear is an innate human instinct that I think you should listen to, I do not believe it should always stop you from pushing forward. Some of the best accomplishments I’ve ever achieved have come from working through fear. Read more  oursocalled20s.com

Of course, there are different types of fear. There’s fear of rejection. There’s fear of failure. There’s fear of falling. There’s fear of loss of stability. The kind of fear that most impacts me is fear of a tarnished reputation when I fail or miss the mark. “What will people think of my abilities if I don’t knock this out of the park?” That is a topic for another time. If you’re reading this, my guess is that you’re afraid of rejection or failure. One thing I want you to remember is that you didn’t fail, you were just walking down the wrong sidewalk. Turn around and find another one. The right path is bound to be out there.

You are your best advocate

My high school volleyball coach once told me, “You will always be your best advocate. If you don’t speak up for yourself, no one else ever will.” That wisdom has stuck with me throughout my whole life. In my opinion, it’s one of the truest statements you can grasp. At the end of the day, how can someone else ever know what you want if you’ve never expressed it?

You know yourself better than anyone. You know best what your strengths and your weaknesses are. No matter the job or the thing you’re gunning for, focus on selling your strengths! Figure out what the job requires that you have hands-down and lean in on that. Oftentimes, we let the things we don’t have cut us out of the race. We give more weight to the things we lack than the things we excel at. The reality is that anyone can learn anything, especially in today’s day and age. So let them decide if that skill or ability is really that important to their company. This leads me to my next point…

Don’t cut yourself out the race

Too often we don’t even try to go after what we want because we assume the answer is going to be “no.” I encourage you to let someone else decide that you’re not fit for a role. At the end of the day, someone will make that decision, but don’t make that decision for them. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve received calls for a role I’m not that great at, or how often I’ve been hired despite my actual lack of experience in a particular area. There are many people out there who will hire you based on your drive, your perspective, your teachability, or the fact that your experience is the exact opposite of everyone else’s, which adds a different problem-solving perspective to the team.

In life, people will have no problem telling you “no.” A slew of people will miss out on a great candidate, you, and discount the work you’ve done and your potential. Let them. It’s nothing personal; it’s just par for the course. Bet on yourself and be proud of what you have accomplished. At the end of the day, you know the mountains you’ve climbed to get to where you are.

A ‘no’ now is not a ‘no’ forever

I know we all have our own mental timelines regarding when certain things should come our way, but the reality is that the time frame we have planned out isn’t likely to happen. I’m someone who loves a good plan. I try my darndest to make sure everything goes according to the plan if I can help it. But I know deep down, my time frame is not always reality’s time frame. With that said, if you are rejected from a job or someone tells you, “No,” remember it’s not a “no” forever. It’s just a “no” for right now, and that’s okay. Things might change in three months, six months, or even a year. On the flip side, you might actually come across something better later that you actually want more. Sometimes a “no” is a blessing in disguise. No matter what, the experience you had leading up to that “no” should still be considered. Review that experience and take something new away from it. Don’t let the experience go to waste.

Rejection sucks no matter how you spin it, but don’t let past rejection or the fear of rejection stop you from pursuing what you want. At the end of the day, the worst someone can say is “no,” and, ultimately, that doesn’t change anything about your life. It only tells you to try walking down another sidewalk.